By Betty Stevens
When a child dies, you ask, among other questions, what is left? A beautiful, sensitive, intelligent child has died. What can be left after such a crushing blow? Others will point out that you have a spouse, other children or grandchildren, perhaps relatives or friends; they are left. You read books on bereavement, scarcely remembering what you have read; you attend meetings, talk with others who have suffered a loss like yours. If you are fortunate, you have one or two friends who, while they cannot fully understand, are there to love and listen. Perhaps there is a therapist who guides you in your search for an answer. But, for a long while everything you read or hear has little meaning and certainly cannot provide the answer to your question. Or can it? Does all that you have read and heard and experienced finally come together and answered the question of what is left?
For me it does. The answer was thirteen months in coming, but how clear it comes now. I am left. That’s it! I am left and I have been left with the love of my child. It is a new love; it is different, more intense; it is understanding; it need not be reciprocated; there are no strings attached. I love this love of my child. It warms and comforts me. It is a wonderful love, but I cannot keep it. It is too precious to keep to myself. I am left with the love to spare and love to share. It will never run out. My child will always be with me to replenish it. I have found my answer. I am left to share my child’s love with you.
The Cord
We are connected, my child and I,
by an invisible cord not seen by the eye
It's not like the cord that connects us 'til birth,
This cord can't be seen by any on earth
This cord does its work right from the start
It binds us together, attached to my heart
I know that it's there, though no one can see
The invisible cord from my child to me
The strength of this cord is hard to describe
It can't be destroyed, it can't be denied
It's stronger than any cord man could create
it withstands the test, can hold any weight
And though you are gone, though you're not here with me
The cord is still there, but no one can see
It pulls at my heart, I am bruised, I am sore
But this cord is my lifeline as never before
I am thankful that God connects us this way
A mother and child, death can't take it away
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